Can you believe our wedding day is only 1 month away?! I can hardly contain my excitement on becoming your wife! I cannot begin to even express the excitement, and nerves, and complete fascination that my heart and soul are feeling right now.
You know I'm a writer. I love to write letters, help you with papers, and obviously this blog. You are my biggest supporter of my words. Thank you for encouraging me to keep this blog positive and uplifting for women (and men) around this world (I can dream). Thank you for showing me how to be that person.
I can remember our first date like it was just last night. I can remember the exact outfit you wore, the ride to the movies, the songs you played for me, our long night of just talking and learning more about each other on your tailgate. Hunter, it was that night that I knew I could be myself with you. It was that night that I felt like I had found a long lost friend. Thank you for your genuine kindness and interest in me that night. Thank you for just sitting and talking with me for hours, without trying to make a move. You tried to hold my hand that night, but you moved at my speed. Thank you for that.
When Nene (Hunter's grandmother) was sick, I can remember staying by your side. We had only been "dating" for just a few months so I didn't know how you grieved. I can remember asking you, "Do you want me here or do you need space? I don't know how you work in these situations, so I need you to tell me." You asked me to stay by your side, and so I did. Remember how we would just sit on her front porch for hours and hours on end, without saying anything at all? Just being in each other's presence was enough. I will never forget the moment she passed, and watching your heart break. I would be lying if I said it didn't kill me. But I stayed as strong as I could for you. And I'll continue to do so as we will surely face more heartache in this life together.
Remember that first Auburn football game we went to together? That gorgeous hotel we stayed in? I can remember how your face lit up at the spirit that the small town of Auburn has to offer. It was then that you developed a love for Auburn, much like mine.
I can remember that very morning after St. Patrick's Day you cried to me, in total desparation, for your life to change. You had been out all night, doing your usual routine that you used to do. I remember I stayed home, simply because I was tired and wasn't into that whole scene anymore. I can remember how my heart broke that night for you because you had stumbled in beyond drunk and said things you didn't mean, but my heart rejoiced for you the next morning when you realized you needed to change. God had literally brought you to your knees physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
Remember how we started going to church and we were so happy to finally have this change in our own lives and relationship? Remember that one night you slipped back down that slope, were pulled over, and by the grace of God alone, a dear friend (who is a cop) just happened to be working that night, recognized your name when they ran it, and came to pick us up? I will never forget my reaction to his arrival... God had truly sent an angel that night. Do you remember how angry I was at you that next morning? At us? I remember telling you, as I was getting ready for church, that I couldn't do it anymore. It was either all in with Jesus, or nothing at all. You obviously chose Jesus.
Hunter, that day you dropped to your knee to ask me to be your wife, will forever be burned into my memory. I remember I couldn't speak because I was crying and so dadgumit happy! You were so so nervous! It was a beautiful day because just a few hours before you proposed, we had made a public testimony to follow Christ through baptism. God was smiling that day.
I don't know what the next few weeks will bring, or years for that matter. But all I know is that I will have you by my side. I'm still in awe and wonder by God's miraculous plans. You knew I came from a place of darkness, brokenness, and the fear of being in love. You patiently waited for me to open my heart to you, and I am forever grateful for you. I promise to love you with all my heart, soul, and more as Jesus has loved us first. I promise to be your supporting actress with anything in life. I promise to try and not throw temper tantrums when I don't get my way. I promise to share the cookie dough with you. I promise to be the best mother to our children that I can possibly be.
I promise to always hold you accountable for your faith in Jesus, just as I know you will do to me.
Hunter, I love you more than words can say. I pinky promise square times infinity on that.